Monday, July 21, 2008

What Happened to Feminism?

There was a time when feminism was about empowerment and equality, when women wanted an equal chance to win or lose as long as the rules were the same for all. Women didn't want to be dictated to, coddled or protected. They discovered that they could accomplish anything men could...do any job, be the boss, run a company, fly a fighter jet. So, when exactly did women decide to take a 180 degree turn into whining, fear, need, and blame? I must have missed the memo.

More and more I've noticed that people who identify themselves as feminists fear and demonize men. Men are scary, men will hurt them, men need to learn that they are scary vile creatures who need to behave in certain ways so as not to frighten the delicate sensibilities of women. Wow, flashback to the Victorian age.

Now, I got into an argument along this line over at a certain web site and after just having my mind blown by the responses and wanting to "be nice" I simply gave up. This is my house, and I don't have to be nice so here's the thing .... some of these women are so entrenched in the culture of victim-hood that every offense is and attack and a victimization. Basically, they blame men for their own failings and behaviors. They place expectations on men that they themselves would, hopefully, bristle at immediately.

One example is the idea that one can sexually harass up the chain of command. Can't happen, it's about power and the one in power cannot be harassed by an underling unless, and here's the crux of the matter, they allow it. If someone works for you and they're being crude you need to be assertive and use the authority of your position to correct their behavior. If you allow it to continue unchecked IT'S YOUR FAULT. If you cannot function because of an irrational fear of men who work for you attacking you after an admonishment you need medication and therapy. You also have no business hiring anyone for anything. Seriously, is you need that much hand holding just have someone do these things for you so as to save yourself and everyone else a whole lot of unnecessary grief.

Another fine example, OK there's nothing fine about it really, is that men should behave in particular ways to avoid frightening or offending women. I actually saw pulling over in a car referred to as a "scary male behavior". Excuse me but feminism started with the ideal that men could not dictate to women how they should behave just because they were women. Now it's OK to dictate to men? Respect runs both ways. If they can't dictate to us we can't dictate to men. It's called equality. Wasn't that a core belief of feminism at one time? When did a double standard and demonizing men become the rule?

Then there's the fear factor. When did it go from take back the night to living in fright? The idea that any man at any time can turn on you is not only irrational it's bigoted. It also sounds frighteningly familiar. It sounds like what southern whites said about blacks in the dark days of slavery. Feminism was based on the idea that bigotry based on sex was wrong. That includes bigotry towards opposite sex, ladies.

All the evil in the world is not the fault of men. Criminals commit criminal acts, merely having a Y chromosome is not a factor. If you cannot Girl Up in any given situation it's not the fault of men, it's yours. Your fear, your failing, your inability to function cannot be blamed on whatever man happens to be handy. Bad things happen to everyone, some people cope and some don't. To try and rationalize blaming men for your inability to cope isn't feminism, it's the antithesis of feminism. Please do me a favor and call yourselves something else. I'd suggest man-hating castrating harpies. Wait, isn't that what men feared most the movement would become way back in the 70s? Congratulations you've set the movement back over 30 years. Seriously, turn off Lifetime, put on your big girl panties, and stop whining. I want my movement back.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Knuckles and Marrow and Shanks OH MY!

Well, I went to pick up our yearly beef and pork this past Saturday. There's good news and bad news. Let's start with the bad.

My sister moved so we tried a new farm. We found one in NH halfway between us and ordered a whole cow and a whole pig. I sent in my deposit and the Monday before our scheduled pickup the woman who runs the farm called to go over the cuts. Strike 1 - the price went up 20 cents a pound. Now last time I checked I sent a deposit at a set price and that should be my price. She said it was the butcher that went up and felt bad, etc. OK I'll let this one pass because small business have it tough in a good economy and energy costs are through the roof and I'm not surprised the butcher went up those freezers cost big bucks to run. My sister wanted to put the date off for 2 days but the farm was unable to do so because of freezer space so I told my sister she better figure it out because my freezer won't hold a whole cow. Freezers, remember the freezers.

On Wednesday I called my father's mechanic, he's had the minivan for 3 weeks it only needed an inspection and I REALLY need it on Saturday. Well he FORGOT and said he'd take care of it ASAP except his inspection machine is broken. OK dude you've had it for 3 weeks and I really needed for Saturday because there's no way I'm fitting 800 pounds of meat in a Thunderbird. Did I mention Dad also flaked on the date? I have to pick up his share as well as mine. I only sent the freaking deposit in the Spring, it's July now, the date hasn't changed.

Mechanic man promises the van will be ready by Saturday, I should mention he fears me, this has to do with me pretty much kidnapping him from the garage when a van he just fixed died in the driveway and I dragged his butt to the house. There's nothing quite like a 5 foot 2 inch chubby Italian housewife ordering your ass into a car in front of your customers and employees and reading you the riot act. He pretty much tries to avoid pissing me off.

So, now it's Saturday morning and I send hubby down to get the van. Hmmmm it was taking a long time then my cell phone rings and the part for the inspection machine has just arrived. A half hour tops he SWEARS. OK, I'm miffed but it's manageable we still have a hour until we have to leave. I started getting the coolers ready to load into the van, we have 4 large coolers to keep the meat frozen on the drive. Hubby of course isn't home in an hour, did I mention the garage is less than a mile away? WTF is going on down there? My sister has called 3 times, my father twice, we're late and there's nothing I can do about it.

Hubby finally pulls up a half hour after we are supposed to be on the road. Apparently the car threw a belt as he was trying to leave the garage. They had to wait for the part and now we're good to go. Well not good, hubby says not to call the garage Mechanic man was VERY sorry and owes us a favor. In other words Mechanic man and hubby fear my wrath at this point and they're covering for each other a smidge. I make sure hubby has told Mechanic man that I need this van for moving hundreds of pounds of melting meat and I'm not pleased.

About 40 minutes into the drive my sister calls again, she's bored, I tell her 10 more minutes we'll be there. She says there's another issue. Strike 2 - the meat is NOT, I repeat NOT, FROZEN. OK WTF didn't I HAVE to pick up this meat today because they didn't have freezer space? Wasn't the price hike for the energy costs going up for the freezers? Oh, and the pork isn't ready. It was supposed to be but it's not. Sister dearest asks what she wants me to do and I tell her I have to think and we'll talk about it face to face in 10 minutes.

Now, I'm usually pretty fast on my feet but I've already had a heck of a morning and my brain was a little fried. At this point I'm also pretty cheesed off. In fact, I'm about ready to tell the farm lady to go perform an unnatural act with one of her animals and hand me my deposit back or I'll see her in court. Seriously gas is over 4 bucks a gallon and this isn't a short drive. On the bright side I had 10 minutes to cool off before we got there.

Of course it didn't last long. They said the butcher had a freezer issue and while the meat is quite cold it's not frozen solid yet. OK I paid for FROZEN MEAT. I dunno where this lady found this butcher but he really needs a slap and a boot in the rear. Next, in order to try and appease me, they offer to hold the meat at the farm until it's fully frozen. W T F?! Didn't I just HAVE to pick up the meat today? Weren't they short of freezer space? Didn't I go through a morning of hell with this stupid POS van of my father's to even get here today when I HAD to be here? Oh and let's consider the money in GAS I used for the freaking drive. I'm now approaching apoplectic and hippy health nuts or not I'm plopping my fat rear outside the front door and having a smoke while I consider my options.

After some negotiating and a LOT of apologizing we got a 50 credit off the bill for the gas and a promise that this would NEVER happen again. Here's the thing, not every customer is willing to write a 3,000 check for meat, I have a little leverage, they want to keep me. So we load up my van and sister's van and go off on our merry way. Thank god for the coolers and my thought to being ice packs JUST IN CASE.

Think it's over?? I wish, just wait.

So my sister drives off and hubby backs out and steers us towards home. Suddenly there's a weird but ominously familiar flappy thuddy sound from the engine. The noise is quickly followed by a funky smell. We threw a belt. Same belt that got put on that morning by Mechanic man. Just some advice here, NEVER let the BOSS fix your car. Have one of the employees do it, the boss always does sucky work. So I have hubby turn the van around and go back, we only got about 100 yards anyway. I call my sister on her cell and scream for her to come back. I scream because I'm losing my cool and my mind at this point and the super spotty cell service is not helping, she can barely hear me.

So my sister pulls up beside us and we pop the hood. It's not easy to see into the engine of a van and while we can't spot the problem the funky smell is pretty strong. Did I mention I just loaded this van with hundreds of pounds of beef that cost me thousands of dollars and that it was supposed to be frozen but isn't? I should add here that despite the fact that they had months to anticipate the cost of the meat neither my sister not my father actually had the money. I had to write a whopper check to cover for everyone, who needs to pay the property taxes anyway right? I'm also going to point out that the above family members make SIGNIFICANTLY more money than hubby and I'm a housewife. It's been a good month if he have money leftover for McDonalds, seriously we're kind of poor.

I didn't want to risk losing the meat if the van didn't make it home so we loaded the hundreds of pounds of meat into my sister's van, she of course lives in the OTHER DIRECTION, and head towards my house. Poor hubby is left on his own to wait for AAA. Just when I'm thinking nothing else could possibly go wrong the light at the only intersection we have to get through goes wonky and my mother calls. So while my sister is trying to navigate the intersection my mother is playing 20 questions the spotty cell service version. Move 2 feet no signal, 2 more it's back, fun for the whole family. It finally ends with me telling my mom that I left the door open and she needs to go in, sit on the freaking sofa, turn on the freaking TV, and wait for further freaking instructions. I did not actually use the word freaking. She hung up on me. My sister and I laughed hysterically, it was just that kind of day. Yes, sometimes I talk to my mother that way, you'd have to know my mother to understand why it's on occasion acceptable.

So I finally get home with the meat and we carry it through the bulkhead to the freezer in the basement and pack it in tight. I had to crank the freezer all the way to igloo, yes there's an actual picture of an igloo and it's a setting on my freezer. My mom heads to her mom's and leaves her Bichon Frise at my house. Nice of people to ask if I want to dog sit the worlds clingiest, hairiest animal in the heat of July. My sister speeds off with her repacked with more ice meat towards her house. Me? I go outside to get dizzy watching the electric meter spin because I just set the freezer to igloo to freeze the meat that was supposed to be frozen when I picked it up. Hubby made it home eventually, the mechanic was apparently both chagrined and frightened to see the van come back on a wrecker. I told hubby to negotiate a freebie or I'd have to talk to the mechanic myself, and NO ONE wants that at this point.

There is some good news. The meat is pretty good and all my butchering was done how I wanted it. I also got lots of knuckles, marrow bones and shanks to make stock. I love home made stock, once you have it store bought will never do. So Sunday I decided to make up the first batch of the year, I have enough stock stuff for three batches and I have a pretty big stock pot. It takes all day but it's not like you have to watch it closely, it mostly just simmers solo. The hardest part was roasting the bones, I hate using the oven in July.
At the end of the day I had a gallon and a half of lovely, dark, delicious, gelatinous stock. It makes great soups and sauces and once it cooled down in the refrigerator I put it down in the freezer. I even remembered to turn the freezer back down from igloo.

Monday, July 7, 2008

Tried Something New Today

I baked pita bread. It's pretty easy as bread baking goes. I was even able to do whole wheat pitas. The hardest part was rolling them out nice and thin.

Then you have to put them in a really hot oven on a pizza stone. Like magic they puff up, I thought it was pretty cool. Halfway through you give them a turn so they get toasty on both sides.

They deflate as they cool and ta-da better then store bought and cheaper as well. I'm thinking about variations already. Rye, herbs, etc..... who knows. Not bad for a morning's worth of baking though.